Aubrey
When you photograph people in color you photograph their clothes. When you photograph people in black and white, you photograph their soul!
–Ted Grant
How we met
Aubrey was the very last portrait taken for 123 ladies edition of the collection and what a joy she was to work with. She made me giggle so much in our early morning catch-up before work. She has a keen eye for fashion and I battled with the choice of whether to include more of her outfit in the photograph but as the quote says above, in black and white, what is captured is the essence of a person. And once I saw those eyes, I didn’t want anything to distract from their magnetic quality. Aubrey is a lady I met through Tegan who even mentions Aubrey in her answers. I love the callouts to women across the project!
Since taking part in this project, Aubrey has since passed away so this interview is shared to honour her memory. Vale Aubrey.
Get to know Aubrey
What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?
Everything in your life is the way it is because you let it be. Plan a little, then jump and build your wings on the way down.
How would you like the men in your life to empower you?
I like to be listened to, believed in, looked after and cared for in a non-condescending way, and the ability to give the same back. This goes for anyone who wants to be a main presence in my life really.
If you were stuck on an island, what three things would you bring?
A satellite phone, a solar charger and water purifier.
What are your guilty pleasures that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?
I love photographing and being photographed. I like wholesome picnics with friends or a day at the beach rather than drinking. I love cheesy romantic gestures and I plan and store ideas away whenever I get inspired. I love learning about money and investing.
If you could witness any historical event, what would you want to see?
In the future, when intolerance is a thing of the past. Then I’d like to experience a day of normal everyday life, to just observe and experience how different it would be. I’m sure there are so many norms that we just accept as being the way it is today, and I’d love to experience a day in a better future – and I’m sure I’ll get to see some in my lifetime. Teleportation and telepathy would be cool too.
“Q: If Hollywood made a movie about your life, who would you like to see cast as you?
A: Myself. I say one line in a Korean TV show so… I’m clearly qualified!”
What, to you, is the most pressing issue women face?
Being told not to strive higher or to ask for more. This is a message that is pervasive and silent, often at a cultural and societal level. It’s ingrained in little actions or an off putting turn-of-phrase, it’s disarmingly casual, it’s slight, and it’s perpetuated by everyone, often including people who care for us, whether they mean to or not.
What did you want to be when growing up?
I wanted to be good, beautiful and charismatic when I grew up. I also wanted to be smooth with words. I also wanted to have time to learn all the languages in the world and read all the books in the world. For occupations, it changed all the time, but the reoccurring ones were: secret agent, princess, judge, writer, an actress, a singer, mermaid, and fashion designer.
What is the most important thing you have learned in the last five years?
Just go do it, then tell people about it afterwards, rather than saying it beforehand. Make decisions out of love, not fear. Give yourself time to rest and try again when something unexpected happens. Be honest at all times. People don’t really care what you do (in the best possible way). Tell someone you like them when you like them, you’ll either have a lover or you’ll give someone a special memory.
To you, what is kindness?
Kindness is understanding. Kindness is just letting someone know you get them, and that you understand them. Kindness is spending time with someone, and understanding their thoughts, actions and intentions, understanding who they are, what they want, that you know what’s in their heart of hearts without judgement and just accept them.
